in my solitude

i want to catch her when she falls, but she refuses my hand

i want to wipe her tears, but she refuses to weep

i want to hug her deep, but she fades every time i come near

she drifts further and further into the dark corner where the moonlight doesn’t reach

she is the shadow, but why it is me who’s sitting

gazing on her back, as she’s staring at the moon

i shut all the cavities under her command

no noises from the outside are allowed to break in

the distance we are making

i hope then…i wish then…..

she would give in and weep, so

i can wipe her tears and hug her deep,

and whisper eternal promise

“we will be okay!”

but she is still in the distance

She reads and watches and reads more

but none reflect her shadow, so she tries to write drawing characters she assumes hers, just to convince her existence. She keeps digging as deep as her mind allows her into, the time when her hands were in his, his kiss on her lips, when she let herself to be discovered and led to meet the world….she gasp for air and dig again, over and over.

She walks and runs and falls and hides and stands to fall again, only to seek her lost reflection, she takes every shelter  she found for her weaken wounded heart, only to be able to…feel again, but only to realize that her heart has long shut.

She sits by the moonlight, holding her knees, forces her heart to cry out, so she can breathe, but no sound but the dark, and even her tears deny her shadow.

She wants to give away her heart to the lovers, but all they see just pieces of broken wings, she wants to give away the beauty she believes to have, but all they feel is the cripple twisted soul. all she gives just reasons for them to walk away, so she can weep and wishing her lost reflection to be with her, again.

How i wish i can promise you to stay holding your hands so you can be strong and loving again, but i live within the wind i must go.

How i wish i can fix your broken glasses so you can feel content again, but i am still looking for my pieces.

How i wish that my touch would make you shine your beauty again…..